Days notice

At this very moment, im thinking to myself the worst that ever happened to me here in my new place; or state. Lets put it that way, but im not sure. I feel like this place is left out, like everythings a whole mambo jumbo. Its rediculous thinking about it, try seeing it. So Im attending this Prep school called GCP, also known as the school of death, not anything life threatening, but it bores the living crap out of you. The people, I'd give it a 3 just because they dont know how to have fun and--they hang out at McDonalds afterschool. Its almost like being back at preschool or at a time and place where you hadnt gotten out of adolescent years. Its almost funny, however I dont say much, i keep all comments to myself. Its ok, their good people, lame, but nice. Several of them think of me as keen, nice, and tidius. Their personalities are mild, I dont feel much excitement, they suck the living life out of me.

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I think its safe to say that my minds focused on the negative is. When i look around, I dont see much, the fact that we're in the middle of a desert might sound timid, but actually its really nice. Hot, but its relaxing, like i dont have any worries. There are plenty of good reasons why im here with Grant, but its for him. Dropping in on subjects, I do however feel helpless. Where I sleep is non of their buisness, but its yours. I sleep in an office.. my uncles office, you know, tight atmosphere, phone calls, no sleep. Oh yeah, sounds attentive, but if we ever slept on the same bed in my apt. It would be on a couch. Its all i've got. My back threw a 360 degree twist falling off that fucking leather couch my uncle presumed would be comfortable this morning. What is it about this place that i like so much, dont know yet. I think I'll stay, life here is a walk on a park.


Im at school right now, Currently 6:37 am. Principals a real Jerk!

The Trip

Im thinking about going to the Europe trip this year at GCP. It's really expensive when you dont have any parents or Legal Guardians to help you financially. Whenever i can, I'll have myself apply for a job, but i dont have much of an option When i first heard of this trip I immidiately went and did research, I just have to go. It was almost exciting thinking about it, having to wait two fractions of a year to go, then finally go. Sounds like a bunch of Bull, when you get there, then what. Finally you arrive and everything you had heard about Spain, Italy, and even France wasnt true or atleast you hadnt expected. Everything went blank for me.

Just a couple of weeks ago i decided not to attend the trip simply because, well i didnt have the money, and im just not prepared enough, and if ever i would even go, it wouldnt be with other studius individuals who annoy the living hell out of you. Its a dont deal. Im out, things havent changed in the last year. I still want the same things. Im still here in Arizona, and i cant wait to see my family in San Francisco, until then, I can wait another year for Europe.

PS: I hear most French men dont take baths.. I like it.

Alive

Yesterday i was online and i was searching for a new top to gift my older brother in California for his eighteen birthday. And i found this really amazing designed shirt, it was tagged "Alive" it's really neat. What is it about these material things, cant get enough about them. Crazy how that works, but who the fuck cares, the world sucks; sometimes shoppings all we have. It cost me a fortune, this shirts insulting, im a sucker for five crowns company, they've listed me for the 40% off for being an 8 month member. This is advantage. Happy birthday Mark !

091608 .

A lot of people asked me in the past what i wanted to do for a living, or atleast where i was headed. At first i didnt understand, at that age, why they would have even been interested. Even though i was a bright kid and just made a playful use of my time, it made me think for a second. My bestfriend and i watch these amazing videos on tv, and we always wanted to be like them, anything to do with dirt bikes, guns, weaponry we were on it. But, somethings just never change, im still into those things. Like i said plotting out of subject. When i hear these questions, normally and usually i would stare blank, at them.. or if she; then her chest. I responded, i want to save people, if not atleast help them. I want to be out there, to learn, see places; sometimes- be safe, but always have to put life on the line.. something dangerous and exciting. I want to be something big.

When i first answered this, i laughed, but the person took it seriously, i had a moment. It fasinates me how well my speech is, i dont like to read, but when i do whether im forced or not (MOM) i do a fair job. It means well.

Europe, thats my goal, after that, south america, then the other contenents. It puts a lot on me, just the thought of it, it excites the living hell out of me. Sometimes i feel alone, whenever i see myself successful, do i have anyone? If i travel, would i set my family aside in place of my dreams. I try not to think too far ahead, occassionally i can smell my hair burning. I think to much, but i think sensably. I dont think i would give up traveling. I dont think so. Maybe my interests will change someday, only after breaking limbs wouldnt I be eligable to travel the way i would want. Again, i think to much.